I get up every morning to enjoy the people I love. Yes I want to contribute to society, change something in the world, understand my place in the world -- but these are abstractions that shape the undercurrents in my life. But that feeling of I must support, be with, learn from, and give and receive joy to those who are important to me is very tangible. It's what I breathe.

I don’t know that I can tell my story in 400 words. I was born in Chennai, India. I lived in Tennessee, Florida, Massachusetts, New York, Missouri and, now, Philadelphia. I studied English and journalism and I’m working for the University of Pennsylvania as a writer. I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years and still miss him when I go to work. These are about .1% of the details that have gone into making me who I am. But who is that? That’s the real story, and that’s the one I’m making up as I go along. When I was 21, I could tell you what my life meant. As I’ve gotten smarter, I can’t anymore. This brings me back to the tangibles, the people whom I love. That’s something I don’t have to make up – proof that my life is real.

The obstacles I’ve faced have primarily been of my own construction. The biggest obstacle one is my tendency to deconstruct my accomplishments so that I can no longer see how they add to my story.

This may have begun during my childhood, which was happy, but gave me many opportunities to ask too many questions. When you’re an immigrant, when you move around a lot, when you read a lot of books, when your parents encourage you to think for yourself and won’t buy you expensive sneakers, you learn very early in life to not accept the stories people tell you. This is good, because the only people who make society go forward are those who question and voice their questions loudly. But sometimes it’s bad because you even learn to be critical of the stories you tell to convince yourself that the things you do mean anything.

This brings me to my experience in the field, which, you may not be surprised to learn, involves writing stories. I interview people and then cobble their answers together to present a meaningful package to readers. My job is to write, but really it’s to listen to other people. It’s great because pretty much every day I learn how someone else makes meaning of their lives and those perspectives help me figure out how I want to lead my own. And I have to listen really carefully, because if I don’t I basically end up writing a lie, and a misrepresentation of life, even a perfectly grammatical one, does great damage to everyone.

My advice, even though I don’t like giving advice, is to women in business, but also to everyone in everything – listen and question. That’s the only way to do the difficult job of figuring out what things really mean, and it’s the only way to begin making your life mean something real.

Finally, the best advice I’ve ever gotten is from Michael Scott, lead protagonist of the American version of The Office. He says, “Sometimes you have to take a break from being the kind of boss that’s always trying to teach people things. Sometimes you have to just be the boss of dancing.”

Priya Ratneshwar (MHC '98)

The European Problem

How American Muslims could become as alienated as European Muslims.

The two terrorist attacks known worldwide by their dates—9/11 and 7/7—inspired suspicion of Muslims in communities in both Europe and America. But each one also symbolizes the different relations each continent has with their Muslim populations. On 9/11, America was attacked by Muslims who came here solely for the purpose of attacking it. On 7/7, London was bombed by British Muslims who were products of their own society. What lessons Europe and America each draw from this will determine the future of their Muslims and their national identity.

The Muslim communities of North America and Europe are often compared, with the conclusion that American Muslims are better integrated, less likely to be radicalized than their European counterparts. But as the war on terror proceeds, racial profiling, the lack of direct communication between Muslims and the government, and the use of paid confidential informants to monitor the Muslim community are all causing an increasing rift between American society and Muslims. In the end, these issues could undo the integration that American Muslims have previously achieved and create the same marginalization and exclusion from society facing European Muslims. This alienation became painfully evident two years ago, when the suburbs of Paris were burning in protest after two French Muslim youths were killed trying to run away from police. The barrier of suspicion made it virtually impossible for French authorities to quell the violence. In response, European countries have been busy trying to create "moderate" Muslim organizations for them to interface with. But these organizations carry very little legitimacy among the Muslim communities they supposedly represent. America is fortunate enough to have a strong civil society from which indigenous Muslim organizations are already emerging. But the strained relations that helped cause the French riots could be developing in the United States if America is not careful to avoid Europe's missteps.

The color-coding of our threat level has not been very good at telling us how to deal with or prevent the actual threats. What has been shown to fight terrorism is local police working with local communities. In last year's Toledo, Ohio, terror plot, where three men were accused of building bombs to aid the insurgency in Iraq, the Muslim community was credited by the local FBI office with stepping forward to support the terror investigation. But these community/law-enforcement relations are strained, particularly because of the increased use of informants—one of the causes of greater alienation of European Muslims. Europe has a longer history of using informants as a surveillance tool in its Muslim populations.

But there is little evidence that this technique works. The case of Shahawar Siraj Matin illustrates the potential problem of using informants. He came with his family to the United States from Pakistan while in his teens. He worked in his uncle's Islamic bookstore in Brooklyn, where he began to speak out about his views on Palestine, the Iraq war, and America's role in the world. Matin was 21 when he was arrested during the 2004 Republican National Convention in New York for plotting to blow up the Herald Square subway station. During his trial, conversations taped by the government informant showed the informant egging him on, saying that the "Brothers"—a fictional terrorist cell created by the NYPD—were counting on him planting the bomb, while Matin is heard saying that he had to go home and ask his mother whether he could do it. This "mama's boy terrorist" had only a high-school education.

In February 2003, the U.S. District Court had granted the NYPD's request to modify the Handshu Agreement, which put limits on police surveillance, to allow, among other things, sending police informants into religious institutions, which is already common practice in Europe. This has had a profound impact on Muslims by substantially increasing domestic surveillance of mosques in America. The 2006 conviction of Matin may have been its first public result. Many Muslims felt that Matin's comments against U.S. foreign policy were being used to paint him as a potential terrorist and that a paid government informant who was decades older than him was pressuring him to plant a bomb in the subway station. The conclusion was that Muslims could not afford to voice their political beliefs.

Historically, the American Muslim immigrant population falls into a higher socioeconomic background than their European counterparts. But like Matin, the next generation of diversity visa winners and others are more similar to European Muslim immigrants. And many of the recent U.S. "terror plots" involve immigrants similar to European ones. While there might not be actual radicalization in the American Muslim community, there is a danger of increasing frustration leading to alienation. In June 2005, Hamid Hayat, a 23-year-old Pakistani-American farmhand with a sixth-grade education, was charged with attending an al-Qaida training camp in Pakistan and being a part of a terror cell in Lodi, Calif. Later that year, Tashnuba Hayder, a 16-year-old Bangladeshi girl who grew up in Queens, N.Y., was accused of being a suicide bomber—though she was ultimately only charged with immigration violations and deported. To the Muslim American community, these cases represented a witch hunt against young Muslims who were being targeted for their interest in Islam and who had limited education or socioeconomic means. They certainly did not demonstrate proof of "homegrown terrorism." Rather, they were symbols of the disenfranchisement or disillusionment of these young Muslims from the mainstream society. Hayder herself illustrated this tension when she told the New York Times, "The F.B.I. tried to say I didn't have a life—like, I wasn't the typical teenager." While the vast majority of Muslim youth are wondering how they can be civically minded Muslim Americans, the government seems to be stuck on the theme of the radicalization of Muslim American youth. Perhaps they have received too much training in Europe.

European Muslims and American Muslims have not had much in common until now, but if we unreflectively adopt the European view of Muslims as the perpetual "other," we risk making this true. "Equality not integration" is the rallying cry of European Muslims. Ours is "due process." Some of our worst laws were passed and later regretted at times of reaction against ethnic communities, from the Palmer Raids of 1919 to today's Patriot Act. In a land founded by immigrants and the rule of law, our nation's strength lies in its resilience; our way of life depends on equal opportunity. Europe and European Muslims are suffering from the inability to bring Muslims into the economic and political mainstream. Will America turn its back on its rich heritage of celebrating diversity? Will we start to see Muslims as a "law and order" problem as Europe does, rather than as the next wave of dream-seekers?

Moushumi Khan graduated from Mount Holyoke College and received a J.D. from Michigan Law School.

On Doing What You Love

The best advice I’ve ever received is to follow your passion. It basically means: do what you love. I know the second part of that sentence is that the money will follow – but trust me, sometimes the money doesn’t really matter if you are doing what you love.I was born in India, and raised in Crown Point, Indiana. I would say my defining characteristics are my ability to laugh at myself, poke fun at others, and my love of reading.

Reading defined my existence. It probably defined my personality than anything else in my life. I learned about different worlds, foreign cultures, and most important, reading allowed me to find out who I was and what I really wanted....And what I wanted was to read. I read anything and everything. Work was anything that wasn’t reading. In college, I chatted with one of my friends, an English major (who could make money doing that??) and she mentioned an internship as an editor in a publishing house.

I was pre-med at the time, and basically flunking organic chemistry. I realized that this was the job for me—it was perfect. I could read, talk to authors, read, edit books, and read some more. I could talk about books all day long with no one to stop me!I graduated in 1999 and accepted a job at HarperCollins Publishers. There, I lived in a very shady area of Jersey City (rent was $300 a month) and my starting salary was $22K. I loved it.

Now, I’m a full editor. It’s taken me a few years and the salary is higher, but it’s a job that I can’t imagine leaving. I don’t doubt for a moment that for me this is the job I needed – and I can’t imagine that I was once set to go pre-med.When you are doing what you love, you are happy. Happiness to me breeds serenity. And if you have the passion for whatever it is, be it a plumber, an editor, or whatever, you’ll be successful. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, and maybe not in the same terms you thought you would be when you started, but the work becomes its own reward. In doing whatever it is that you know you’re good at, the work is no longer work. It transcends work and becomes something else. It becomes passion.And don’t worry...I’m still waiting for the money.

Devi Pillai graduated from Mount Holyoke College in 2000.

Remove the Ring?

This article appeared in the Wall Street Journal back in February, but I just came across it on another great website, Ms. JD. Although I've never encountered this issue before, I have to say that I - sadly - wasn't surprised to read of this woman's concern. What do you think women should do? Has anyone experienced this dilemma firsthand?

Wall Street Journal, February 27, 2007, 10:50 am

When You Land the Job Interview, Should the Ring Come Off?

Posted by Sara Schaefer Muñoz

Should women applying for jobs take off their engagement or wedding rings?

When we posted about a study that showed employers still screen résumés for mommy status, some Juggle posters said they’d think twice about making a reference to their children in their CVs, and they’d consider slipping off the wedding ring, as well.

I was shocked — until I remembered I had done the same thing with my engagement ring. Several years ago, during my engagement to my husband, I applied to the Journal. On the way to the bureau where I had my interview — in the midst of checking my résumé over dozens of times for typos — I weighed whether or not to remove my ring. On the one hand, I felt ridiculous for even considering it — thinking that in this day and age it shouldn’t matter. On the other hand, I really wanted that job. I had no idea about the office culture and I didn’t want anyone making assumptions — however unreasonable — about my commitment to the position. Before getting on the elevator, I slipped the ring into my pocket.

I can say now I’m sure it wouldn’t have mattered. It turned out that many in the office were married with kids. They sold Girl Scout cookies and discussed Halloween costumes. Editors oohed and aahed over my wedding photos and, later, regaled me with parenting books and name suggestions when I was pregnant. Looking back, I felt that the ring-removal had been absurd.

But the recent comments suggest I wasn’t alone in my concerns. Has any other woman — or man! — considered this? Have you known some employers to flinch when they see a wedding or engagement ring? Or was your decision based upon your own — possibly unfounded — concerns?

Wordplay

H
O how we hanky panky harum
scarum in our happy home, dancing hootchy
kootchy. Sure, it makes for hugger mugger
but we give a hoot for happenstance.
The yard is full o' hound and hares; the door
adorned by hammer and sickle; in the closets, hand-
me-downs. If Hammurabi and his Queen come
by, we won't be hoity-toity, we'll
offer haggis or humble pie. Our bed
floats on hocus-pocus (our corpore
wholly habeas) and the kitchen hums
a hymn, Hail to Higgledy-Piggledly.
If the world can't call our hurly burly hunky
dory, let it hara-kiri if it dares.

- NATASHA SAJÉ

Word of the week: gumption!

I absolutely love the word "gumption" and know so many splendid, courageous women who embody this particular quality, and lead their lives boldly. I looked up the exact meaning on dictionary.com, since I was throwing the word around on a daily basis, and today I'd like to share it with you.

gump·tion / [guhmp-shuhn]

1. courage; spunk; guts: It takes gumption to quit a high-paying job.

2. initiative; aggressiveness; resourcefulness.
3. common sense; shrewdness.

[Origin: 1710–20; orig. Scots] —Related forms gump·tion·less, adjective; gumptious, adjective.

Send us some more words that you use to describe your friends, role models, mentors, and teachers!