The other day I was on the bus and an individual got on and started to have an argument with the bus driver. My take was that the guy wanted a ride and didn't have money to pay. The bus driver told him he would have to get off at the next stop. From then on the man kept cursing and arguing. I was seated in the middle of the bus and I wondered how long it would take me to run to the front if the bus driver was clobbered by this guy. You know, its odd, but I was surprised that the thought entered my head. My younger sister once explained to me the psychology of humans, whereby we often run away or close our eyes to those in need around us. We've often heard the stories of an individual who was robbed/raped etc. and several people were standing around, but they did not intervene. Per my sis, people often believe since there are so many people around, that someone else will take on the responsibility to help. We thereby make ourselves feel at ease that we are not in the wrong.
I have a cousin in london who was just sitting on the train, returning home from school. A young 19 year old boy, who to another's eyes may appear to be a thug because of his baggy shirts and a faze haircut. He is South Asian. Another South Asian ran in to the same compartment and sat down, breathing heavily. A group of boy of another background ran in and started beating this guy. My cousin looked down and away. At one point he looked up. They noticed and they started beating him as well. This occured in the U.K. While racial problems are by far from over and considered to be the more obvious cause of violence in this case, it really makes you think. What would you do? My cousin had a broken nose and a lot of pain, but he was safe. When do we step in and say no and when do we step back and let a situation play out in front of our eyes? Do we need to prep ourselves in advance as I felt the need to do on the bus? Does it differ if you are male or female? Is a female more likely to call 911, is a male more likely to get involved in a fight?
Another situation for your thoughts. In the midnight hours of downtown Toronto, a large festival was taking place. Out of nowhere a black SUV made a sudden left turn and swiped a guy crossing the street (on his bike). The sidewalks were filled with hundreds of festive-goers. At that moment 10-15 people ran towards the victim, some to help him, some to get the license plate on the vehicle. I was not one of those people. In shock, I watched as these shadows ran past me. For those who do know me, I pride myself on being kind, trusting and helpful. So much so that sometimes it does get me in trouble. So this made me stop and think, why didn't I rush forward? Why did I wait? Am I one of the bystanders mentioned by my sis, who waited for others to help. How do I change my behaviour and how can we encourage others to change their behaviour. When we as individuals stand up for others rights and are intolerant of violence, maybe, just maybe, those who commit the offences will think twice.
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